Debate, Discussion or Dialogue?

The Multi-faith Events at Canterbury School were started as a result of the Haven Interfaith Parent (HIP) mission statement. The HIP mission statement reads, The Haven Interfaith Parents support the mission of Canterbury School and encourage an understanding and appreciation of all beliefs and faiths, with the goal of promoting peace in our community. The upcoming event, How Good Must I Be? The Consequences of My Choices is the fifth event sponsored by HIP.

A criticism I often hear about the Multi-faith Events is that I don’t allow the speakers to ‘go at it’.  The thought is, if the presenters become heated during the event, the real truth will be expressed. In our culture this sort of debate of people ‘going at it’ has become entertainment.  It is especially entertaining if our side makes the best points and if our side makes the other side look ridiculous.  

As a teacher I use debate, discussion and dialogue in my classes depending on the objectives of the lesson. In a debate there is always a winner and a loser. After a debate the winners continue to strengthen their side of the issue. The losers have become aware of the weaknesses in their debate and will work on strengthening those weaknesses. Instead of thoughts, opinions and ideas being changed, each side continues to bolster their position. If the goal is to change someone’s mind or develop an understanding of another way of thinking a debate is the least effective way for that to occur.

Even discussion does not work for the Multi-faith Events. The goal of discussion is to take apart a topic and persuade others to a certain way of thinking in order to reach a common outcome. The  premise of the Multi-faith Events is the theologies of the various faiths are different.  The purpose of the events are not to find a common theology. As Rick Love of Peace Catalyst International has written, “Multi-faith dialogue is based on common ethics and the common good rather than common theology.”  At the Multi-faith Events the common ethic is discovered but the goal is not to create a common theology.

The mission of HIP is to, “encourage an understanding and appreciation of all beliefs and faiths, with the goal of promoting peace in our community.” With the goal of promoting peace, dialogue is what must occur at the events. I recently heard someone say dialogue is listening to someone as if your life depended on the information. In order to survive everything must be remembered. That is intense listening. When I have truly listened to others I find that they are more likely to listen to me. This is the basis of all relationships. For us to understand each other we must be in relationships and we must listen to each other.  There is a passage in the Bible that tells me how to dialogue. I Peter 3:15 states, “Always be prepared to give an answer for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.” It is in dialogue that we can be honest and with gentleness and respect say what we believe. Being in dialogue says we care about the relationship.The Multi-faith Events are intentionally designed to be a dialogue because I desire for those in our community to be in relationship with each other. I hope you will attend the Multi-faith Event: How Good Must I Be?  and will listen like your life depended on it.