Not Alone

As September quickly approaches I am plotting a course for the Haven Interfaith Parent group which I lead. This is the second interfaith group which I have led. The first group met once a month for three years. This second group has met once a month for one year. We are on the start of our second year. As I’m planning the first meeting I wonder if the other members feel what I feel. Maybe I shouldn’t admit this, since I am the leader, but before each meeting I feel apprehension. Before each meeting I wonder, is this going to work? Throughout the years I have found many amazing people around the world who are striving to make peace through multi-faith or interfaith dialogue but when I started this journey I was aware of only a few. When I began this journey I was not using a tried and true tested ‘model’ of interfaith dialogue; I was on my own.  I knew what I was asking of the HIP members was not easy and it made me apprehensive. It still does.

Peacemaking is not an easy task. In fact, it is quite difficult. Finding common ground is essential in peacemaking endeavors. And there is much common ground to find. Finding common ground let’s us relax in our friendships and realize we are a community. That is the fun part. But peacemaking cannot stop there. It is when discussing those areas where we disagree that is the difficult task. And as I have said before that is where true peacemaking occurs. Both HIP groups have bravely ventured into this arena with me.

At each interfaith meeting I have some sort of ‘activity’. This ‘activity’ typically causes much laughter but we also learn more about each other.  In the second year of meeting with the first group I planned a different sort of activity. On a piece of paper each person was to finish this sentence: When I’m at HIP I fear…? Once the response was written on the paper, the paper was folded and put in a bowl. After all the responses were in the bowl we each took out one of the responses to read. This way we were not reading our own responses.  What we discovered through this activity created a deeper bond among us. You see, we were all apprehensive and fearful. Here are the responses:

When I’m at HIP I fear…

•  saying the wrong thing and offending someone
•  a wall may be built instead of a bridge
• I may hurt other people’s feelings, since a lot of my beliefs are so very different
•  not knowing what to say
• expressing a very contrarian idea or viewpoint
• others will think less of me for my beliefs
• loss of my family
• not knowing my faith enough to be a good representation and thus not educate the group in the importance of our religion

Even though I am starting my fifth year of interfaith dialogue, I am apprehensive as I’m planning the next meeting. I’m still asking, is this going to work? I'm still asking that question even though after every meeting I have felt a feeling of exhilaration. After each meeting I have realized that we did do the hard work of making peace. And it was amazing. Thank you to my dear friends in HIP for teaching me so much. I am not alone.